Friday, July 29, 2005

The Open Window

Something happened in my Introduction to Communication Theory class. The topic for the day was the Johari Window. The Johari Window is a way of intrapersonal relationship that tackles four windows which tells something about your personality assesment
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The OPEN window tells something that I and everybody else know
The BLIND window tells something that I don't know but another person know
The HIDDEN window tells something that I know but nobody else know
The UNKNOWN window tells something that I and other people don't know
We we're asked to do a presentation about it. It was good since we got to open up something about ourselves but when Joselito who is a irregular student presented his hidden window the mood of the class changed. He opened up how he feels alone and unwanted and then he cried. Our class transformed from a simple lecture to a sharing/advising/counselling session. My classmates gave thier advices,views and some also shared their own experiences. Joselito spoke again and he said that he also feels bad when people (his own father too) suspected him of being gay because of his mannerisms and the fact that he is the only male of three offsprings;her sisters might have influnced her to turn gay. He also said that his classmates mock him about that. That's when I also shared something and gave him advice. I was also been suspected of being gay due to many reasons like I don't do "macho" things. I told Joselito that I know what he feels since I also feel it. I know it's hard when people(friends,family) judge your personality. But don't let them bother you as long as you know within your heart that you are not homosexual do not care what they tell about you. I used to be really bothered when people suspect me of being gay to the point that I try to do those "manly" stuff just to prove them wrong. But I got tired eventually I just thought let them be on what they think of me. I know being a man is not measured on how macho you are or how many girls you dated so why do I let myself be bothered with this? I hope Joselito understand what I was talking about (you know I talk fast). Also another irregular classmate of ours Arvie also spoke his mind. He revealed that he is gay and he was really conscious on what we (my block JOU21) will think about him so that's why he rarely participates in class. He went on saying the experience he had and how he learned from it. I admire him for openingh up to us. Our block really don't mind of him being gay (well some girls find it sayang since they find him cute). We accept him whoever he is because there is nothing wrong with being gay. It was a thought provoking class it was good to know that some people are brave enough to unleash their inner feelings. Some may find what happened mushy but for me it will be one of the memorable classes I ever had.

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Scores

Well it's been a week since I updated my blog. I have been busy with my exams and some other stuff. Well here is a summary on how I faired on my exams: MEDIOCRE. I think will not get low scores but the results are not that high, just okay. I don't think having a OK grade is bad is just that I feel if I study more I will get better scores. Some of the exams could been easy but I just did not prepare that much because I was too lazy. I just browsed my notes and some subjects are just not that interesting to me so I'm not really motivated to study. In my first sem here I had a subject which I really did great, it was Literature of the Philippines. I have gotten perfect scores on both prelims and midterms, nobody else in my class have done that. So far in my almost two years stay here in DLSU-D that's the only time that I had 100% on a major exam. My average on major exams is 10 points away to a perfect score. During that time I was really engrossed with the subject and the professor is really great. After that no other subject really gave me that effect. Well I'm just taking up minors and a "minor" major maybe as I go on with my course I will encounter subjects that will get me moving.

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Last Monday La Sallian Speech Club release the students that passed the screening and fortunately I'm included in the list. To be honest I am confident that I will make it to LSC since I did fair well on their screening but what surprise me is that I had a high score= 93%. I did not expect that and by the way I ranked no.2. It's a given fact that I talk fast and I really need to work on my speech skills so I was really surprised that they find me good enough to get that score. It gave me hope that I could still be able to speak with confidence and clarity (and slowly of course). Well it's been good semester so far,first I was accepted at HF and now I'm a part of LSC and I passed with flying colors.

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Yesterday I saw my English teacher in highschool. We had a small talk and when I told him that I'm taking up Broadcast Journalism he said that I could make it. He also said to me that it was his frustration to be a journalist too bad circumstances prohibited him to attain it. My English professor is one of the one I look up to. Because of him I got interested with communication and it lead to me taking up this course. He is an excellent teacher, I learned a lot from him. Seeing him reminded me of why I love working with words. I hope that I will meet his expectations and could really make it.

Tuesday, July 19, 2005

Prelude to Prelims

Today is the start of the Preliminary Examinations. But I'm here at ERS (the internet section of the library) surfing the net. Why am I doing this? I should have been studying right now. Well,I have no exams scheduled today. Here is my examination schedule:


Wed 07/20
08:00-09:00
ERH106
RETORIKA

10:00-11:30
CET406
ART APPRECIATION

16:00-17:30
ERH105
BASIC COMPUTER OPERATIONS

Thu 07/21
08:00-09:30
OSH104
PHILIPPINE GOVERNMENT & NEW CONSTITUTION

14:00-15:00
JFH310
SPEECH AND ORAL COMMUNICATION

16:00-17:30
OSH202
INTRODUCTION TO COMMUNICATION THEORY

Fri 07/22
08:00-09:00
MTH104
LIVING OUR CHRISTIAN COMMITMENT (REED143)


So far my favorite subject is Philippine Constitution because I like the scope of the subject. Plus the professor is good he knows what he is saying, he is not the bookish type. I'm attentive at his class and it wakens up my soul after being inside a one and a half hour class that is not so interesting (read:boring). But my favorite teacher is my REED143 prof. He really has a positive aura and he makes us laugh which I did not expect from him since he is the soft spoken type. He delivers jokes unexpectedly and the punchlines makes us cringe. My other classes are just okay. I'm not good with art so i don't enjoy art appreciation class. Introduction to communcation started good but when we started discussing theories my interest went down. Speech and Oral Communication is a good class aside that we are in an air conditioned room I love the oral exercises although I still find being videotaped awkward,I realized how imortant it is it since I could see what aspects I should improve on. Retorika is a so-so class aside that the topics are not really interesting the schedule is from 7-8:30am my energy is quite low and with that class I'm really having a hard time to concentrate. Computer classes are okay, the hands on exercises are easy since it only involves MS Word but the quizzes I'm just mediocre. I could have done better with my quizzes if I studied more; I only scanned the hand outs because I was too lazy to review.
Anyways I'll do my best to get good scores with my prelims tomorrow.

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Inside The Office

Yesterday I stayed at the Heraldo Filipino office from 1pm till 7pm. The first four hours I spent practically doing nothing. Anyways I read the rough draft of the forthcoming issue,actually they asked us to proofread it. But I really did not do that since well the other staff already did it and there's nothing much left for me to correct since they did a good job and I think I'm not really good in proofreading especially when it comes to grammar. There were also other apprentices mostly frsehmen in the office we had some chat later on the senior staff joined us but the conversation went to Bush to PGMA to World History to Religion to Philosophy, topics that I know little about. But I enjoyed listening to them, I just love how their views contradict sometimes. I like listening to debates but I don't like participating that much . Around 4pm the news staff had an orientation leaded by our news coordinator Deofelyn Ocayo or Ate Lhen as she likes people to call her (not the ate part actually but I choose to call her with ate since I'm her subordinate) . We started by some "getting to know each other" activity where each of us take turns in asking questions and of course answering it. I got questions like what's your favorite book,strengths and weaknesses and expectations at HF news. Someone ask her(Ate Lhen) to described us (the news staff) in one word she described me as articulate. I was surprised since being articulate is something that I could never think of myself. To be articulate is to be clear; distinct; express with clarity and is skillful with words. I assumed that most people do not find the way I speak clear since I talk so fast, well I may sound distinct; skillfull with words? Hmmmm.... Now this is a challenge. The orientation covered topics such as rules and regulations, the people we need to know and some other guidelines to be an efficient HF news staff. Then came our assignments, I was tasked to write about Bro.Luistro's stand on the PGMA issue. Ate Lhen told me that she will assist me on how to work this article out, she said that she has talk to me personally but since we already lack the time she said to me to come tomorrow (which is today) at the office. I'm really nervous about this, this is my first assignment for HF I hope I won't mess up.

Saturday, July 09, 2005

Good News and Bad News

Good News!

I passed the Heraldo Filipino panel interview! But I was designated to the News Section which I did not originally applied for (Features and Literary were the ones I applied to) Still I think the editorial board made the right decision since based from the answers I have given on the interview I did poor on questions pertaining to subjects about Features and Literary. Well I believe i faired well when they asked me about news like the GloriaGate Scandal, E VAT, jeepney discounts etc. There were 6 applicants including myself and only one did not qualify. I felt bad about him and imagined myself what if that happened to me? Good thing I did not experience that since it will definitely crushed me. We, the newbies, will be called The Apprentices which means we will not be in the staff box yet and be subjected to deep observation. We have to do our best for us to be promoted. It will a great challenge since I have no clue on how campus journalism works I will just depend on my instincts and of course will ask around. It's a good thing there is also a senior staff of the news department that shifted to Broadcast Journalism and became a part of our block ( in short, my new classmate) at least there is someone I could ask to. What a night it was, It's actually the first time I came home at night (7:30pm). I don't really like staying out late but last night I waited for the results We have to wait for all applicants to finish the interview before we could know the results and since there were six of us and I was second to be interviewed I waited for about an hour but it was worth it. They (the HF staff)actually offered us to eat after we find out the results but I declined since I have to go home already. But the gesture was nice and I really felt that they are welcoming us with open arms. We actually need to complete a duty of 250 hours at the HF office given that I will now have lesser time to hang around at ERS (the internet laboratory of our library). I will start my duty on Tuesday since I have to fix some things up with my other organization Friends of the Library which now brings me to the....

Bad News!

I have to resign as Vice President of Friends of the Library. The editor in chief told me that one of HF's policy that its staff are prohibited to be officers of school organizations. They asked me if I was willing to give it up, as much that it hurts me to say it, I said "yes". I love FL, it was my first and only organization I joined in during my freshman year but I have to follow what i want., which is to write. For years I have been dreaming to be a campus writer, In highschool there was no opportunity and that made me want it more. In my first year I was too scared to try. Now I already made the first step and I don't want it too pass by. I told this to CMC, the president and Mam Rhoda, our adviser although it made them sad they accepted it. I was really guilty since I feel I abandoned FL. I said that I will still help them even though I will be just a regular member. Tomorrow is our General Assembly CMC asked me that I should still be the VP tomorrow so that there will be no confusement with our new members, I will just pass my resignation on Monday. I'm sad about this but I have to thank FL because they understand me that I just want to pursue my dream
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Wednesday, July 06, 2005

My Eyeglasses Broke...Again!

What a nice start my day! While I was in a jeep on the way to school when one of the lens of my eyeglasses fell, good thing it fell on my bag and not the ground. but the screw got lost, well I did not expect it to find it anyway. It's the second time that this happened to me last year when I was watching a school play my lens also fell and got lost. I t was dark there so my lost lens have g0ne forever. I did not buy a new pair of glasses immediately instead I substituted an old lens (I broke an old eyeglass and took the one of its lens). It was really a hard time since the grado of the lens did not match. So when Christmas came when my parents ask me what I want to have. I said a new pair of eyeglasses. And after 7 months it happened again, good thing I had save the lens, I will just fix it. I realized how important my eyeglasses are like now I am really uncomfortable since I could not see clearly. My eyeglasses have become a part of me, I only took it off when I sleep and take a bath. Some people that I bump with this morning already asked why am I not wearing my eyeglasses. That's what makes me recognizable, I'm the guy who wears eyeglasses. Although I have only been wearing eyeglasses for five years I really felt that it was a long time. But it will be an interesting day, let me see how I will cope without my eyeglasses

The text message that made my day

Here is the text message that I received yesterday at around 11am:
"CONGRATULATIONS! You are qualified for the panel interview on July 7 4pm at the heraldo filipino office. Pls be on time"
I could not believe what I have just read. I think I read that message for about 4 times before it sunk to me " I have passed the qualifying exam".I took the exam last May during my summer classes. After weeks of not hearing from Heraldo I assumed that I failed. I really was not confident that I will make it anyway, the qualifying exam was really hard that all my creative cells was drained out. My handwritng was really awful since I'm so tired (The exam took for about 2 to 3 hours). Plus I felt that I did not gave good essays because the topics/questions was hard and there was one topic that I have no clue what is it all about. I also had my insecurities since I lack the experience of being a campus scribe ( As I have said in my earlier entries my Highschool did not have a school paper). During my freshman year I planned to apply for HF but I chickened out since I'm clueless about campus journalism. However I really felt bad about it because I am such a frustrated writer and I had so many "What if" questions. So I promised to myself that I will not be a coward again and try for our school paper once the oppurtunity comes in. When I saw an announcement that they are on lookout to be a part of them I immediately went to their office. I thought that if I fail at least I tried, I just don't want another oppurtunity pass by. I'm not really an official staff yet but passing the qualifying exam is an achievement to me. I'm really nervous about my interview on July 7 but I'm also excited about it, I really hope that I could really make it.

Sunday, July 03, 2005

Speaking Of....

I have troubles with how I speak. I talk fast to the point that I already eat my words. Ask my classmates ( even teachers) on how will they describe and they will say "Mabilis magsalita" (he talks very fast). I never really realize that I talk really fast not until our Speech and Oral Communication class. We had an oral activity and it was video taped, when the tapes where playing then I realized aside that I look awful on camera (but that is another story) I really talk so fast that even I had a hard time understanding what I said. Aside from that I have a poor diction. This really made me feel bad since I'm also frustrated to be a good speaker. I want to speak in a well modulated voice so that people will clearly hear what I want to say. Oral Communication is really important coz it's direct communciationand this will make or break you, first impressions are also made on how you present yourself orally. I have a theory on why I speak this way, I have asthma and I always feel like gasping for breath when I speak. I applied at La Sallian Speech Club, because I believe I could learn how to speak well through this organization. I really hope that one day I could speak clearly and what I say will not just be heard but listened.